Monday, September 12, 2011

My darling.


image: My own

My posts had been very preachy lately have they not?

So I'll talk about something very light tonight. I'll talk about being in love.

**warning!! mushy post coming up, leave if you're diabetic. (you know because it's sweet and all.. oh never mind)

My other half is finally back in Malaysia. and the other night while we are BBM-ing, yes both kedekut taknak call sebab call charges are outrageous these days, I realize just how much I am still in love with him, even after his 2 years absence. Even after 6 years of relationship.

I have dated jerks before. I still cringe at the thought of what I've had to put up with. Of how I allowed myself to be treated.

The manipulation, how he constantly praises his ex girlfriend (which i doubt even existed, now that i'm wiser) so that i'd feel like i had something to prove.

The trying to change me part, how he keeps picking on my imperfections, making me feel inferior, and trying to fit me in his mould. It's even gotten to an extend where he messaged a girl, some random girl on some social networking page, whom he doesn't even know, complaining about me, of how I'm not fun enough because I don't go to clubs, or drink, or do drugs.

The lying part, how he keeps texting girls behind my back.

And the list will go on. I'm way over that, but sometimes, I wish I had at least bitch slapped him once. But then again, it wasn't entirely his fault,I should've realized that if a relationship consist mostly of drama,it isn't a relationship.

(moral: jangan gatal ada relationship masa sekolah)

Negativity aside, remembering such things make me realize just how lucky I am to have Adam.

How he loves all of me. Right down to my excessive fat. lol

How he thinks I am just perfect, that nothing is wrong with me.

How he looks at me when he's driving, and randomly tells me how beautiful I look. (double chin and all)

How he would never ever try to change me.

How he would *try* to make me happy. (which is a little bit hard to do, because I'm very particular, hehe, but he tries anyway)

How he would look at me adoringly even after all these years.

How he would let me meragam, all bad tempered, and foul mouthed, when it's hot outside, and when I'm PMS-ing, without batting an eyelash, sebab dah sedia maklum.

How he understands me inside out, the way I think, before I think it.

I am grateful of all of that. When I think about it, we had our ups and downs, and even rock bottom, and even worse, dark ages, we managed to come through, and that's all that counts to me.

So, my darling, if you're reading this, this is one of my sane moments, before my psychotic hormone kicks in. Do try to remember what i wrote in here when I'm having on of those flip-table moments alright?

I truly am grateful, and blessed to have you.

I love you. *heart shapes and flower petal terbang terbang, rainbowsin the sky, and fireworks*

Love,
Ska.

4 comments:

  1. alolo..part terbang terbang terus rasa nak pitam... what an imagination ska...huuuu...

    ReplyDelete
  2. hehe. thank u dear. And im still very much in love with u even after all these years :)

    ReplyDelete

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